Third Year
It’s the day after Easter, which reminds me of my last Easter in the States, which reminds me that we’ve been here for about three years now. In Thailand for three years, parents for two, parents of Thai-speakers for one. I forget where I learned it, but I think three years is about the amount of time it takes for one to get used to something – to feel like they know what they’re doing. That’s probably about right. I hope so, because maybe in a year or two I’ll feel like I know what I’m doing in parenting. That’s how it works, right, parents? Hello? Anyone?
In any case, each year has brought its own major changes. The first year was, well, the first year. We moved to a different country, learned a different language, drastically changed many of our closest relationships, and at the end of the year took in our first kid. The second year, we started leaving Im Jai, Sean got married, Matt came to live with us, and we created two new people. Oh yeah, and we moved into a house and bought some land, not knowing exactly why we were doing so at that exact time.
This third year began with serious doubts about what we were doing with our original plan and this big house yet such a small, essentially-American family. But literally two weeks later, we were suddenly a family of eight. Pretty much the whole year since then has been a blur. I remember selling our condo. I understand Cindy and Isaac left me for a time. We are building our own houses. And we’ve learned about a thousand things about parenting, including the repeated difficulties of loving someone whose concept of love may be broken.
Today, Alaypa and Lutiya are in their village for a few days hopefully to get all the paperwork they need for, well, their future. So the house is a little quieter again. This morning, if I can get this post out and make myself work, I hope to get a lot done. In particular, I’m working on Travelers again – hopefully for the last time before I actually, maybe, wishfully try and send this thing out.
STATUS
Still Reading: Ghost Force, Patrick Robinson (and not liking it)
Writing: Travelers, revisions (hopefully for the second to last time)
Last Played: Star Wars Risk and Chess
One of Isaac’s New Tricks: He likes bowling at home with a takraw ball and plastic bowling pins. He claps for himself and says, “Yay!” whenever he knocks them all down (even if he cheated to do it).
You may know something more about parenting in a year or two more, but I felt that I must say that after 54 years of parenting I find that there is still much to learn. I don’t know what we would have done if it were not for God. My hard earned advice is do nothing before checking it out with Him.
Amen to what Jean says. After parenting for almost 39 years and five children – only way is to check it out with Him. There are no good courses or textbooks on this subject. Ever hear of faith and trusting Him totally? This is the one place it really it really applies.
Although you will never have all the parenting stuff figured out, there are things that become easier. Like, you learn to be more organized so you can get everyone out of the house when you need to. And you learn that not everything is worth making an issue over. And you get better at figuring out when someone is really sick and when you can fix them at home. And you learn that whatever stage they are currently in, they will grow out of it, good or bad.