Christ, I Am Nothing
Last Sunday night at Im Jai, a storm took the power out and Cindy and I were the only adults there. But the kids took care of themselves and I, with my lack of knowledge of how Im Jai works and total lack of language skills, felt pretty much useless. I just stood by and watched as some of the older kids got the rest of them inside the house and the kids got candles and matches and lit up the room.
It was really hard at the time, but God was teaching me humility (I suppose it’s impossible to learn humility the easy way). He was teaching me that I have nothing to give these kids. I cannot just walk into Thailand and change their lives. I know God has called me to be a father, even a father to many, but I guess part of that word went to my head and I thought I could do it on my own.
In all humility, I must look to God and Him alone for what He wants me to do at Im Jai, and if I want to help the kids then all I can do is pray and ask God if there’s anything I can do to help. I do not ask because He needs me, but because I want to be included. He has been taking care of His orphans (who are not really orphans for they have a Father) long before I even knew where Thailand was, and He’ll take care of them whether I’m here or not. He didn’t call me here because He needed me. He called me here because I need Him.
I’m with ya 100% man.
Sooooooooooo true. That’s an important thing that we need to remember every moment.
If only we could always fully comprehend that lesson. It is so easy for us to think we are helping God out when we serve Him but it really is that He is teaching us that we need Him and not vice versa. And as He does that He is also teaching us how patient He is with us as we are slow in trying to learn these things. However, isn’t that another lesson He wants us to learn - patience?
Yup…I love how we think we are around to do things for God…what we forget is that he chooses to use us…broken vessels to do his work that he prepared in advance for us to do. It’s an honor for us, but it is by no means a necessity for God because he can do it without us if he so desires. Isn’t it amazing that in the process he shows us that he is the one thing we need and nothing more.
Well, the good news is that you’re (I should say “we’re”) only going to have about another 1000 instances of learning this lesson before God stops teaching us about it. And He’ll stop, not because we’ve learned it so well, but because we’re dead.
-M
Matt, I love the way you so succinctly point out life’s little quirks. ;)
Dang. Someone’s preaching. Wow I wish humility was an easy lesson to learn but it would not be humility if it was. I like it better when I can watch others learn it and learn from their example but it sticks in deeper when I learn it for myself. So great post. I miss you all. Hope all is well and keep sean off of his motorcycle. j/k
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